Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Great Advice

Growing up, I was raised in the middle, with an older and younger sister. Many have wondered, how I survived. When I look back at all those years, the countless times of battling with my younger sister, from the first hair being pulled to ending the fight either by exhaustion or parents order, shake hands and make up, there is a message. It was all part growing up, and it was expected that siblings would fight. Even today, tension is expected in any relationship. However, there is a major difference between fighting, confrontation, and debate.

Fighting is often physical.
Confrontation can be physical, typically more verbally in positioning a person in a corner
Debate is simply a discussion between two different points of view

It wasn't until a few years ago, that when living with one another, we laughed and even were reminded of how easy it was to get in a fight. A fight was started for a ridiculous purpose. My sister made dinner, I got up from the table and went to my room. I kissed a friend of hers. Although it never got physical, there was that confrontation.

A great friend reminded me that when you really know someone, you know exactly what buttons to push. Sometimes, they are pushed as a defensive mechanism, you feel threatened and you react. Other times you simply forget, and by that time its too late. The best solution is say sorry and move on. The problem is that once it is said, it can't be undone. (Somewhere in this blog is a reference to nails and a hammer). You can always remove a nail, but the damage to the wood will always be there.

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